Scared Breathless....Twice!

On August 8th, while we were working on the tile, I went to change Jairus's diaper.  We had all of our appliances and everything (including our fridge) in our dining room so things were a little cluttered.  Tali had been playing and when I came out of Jairus's room, I couldn't find her.  I went outside to see if maybe she was with her grandpa, but she wasn't there.  I checked all of the rooms in the house, but still couldn't find her.  By this time, I started to panic.  I ran back outside calling her name and checked the sides of the house and still no Tali.  I then ran to the front yard worried that she unlocked and opened the front door which she learned to do earlier that week.  I was screaming Tali's name at the top of my lungs and there was still no answer and no Tali.  I remember trying to breathe, but it was like I couldn't get enough oxygen in my lungs even when I bent over.  The tears were just falling as though they would never stop.  I ran back inside calling her name and as I was passing our dining room again, I noticed the refrigerator door was open just a little.  Then I saw Tali.  She was trying to sneak food.  I grabbed her and hugged her so tight.  Needless to say we had a talk about her needing to answer me when I call for her.  I have never been so scared in my life.....that is until a few days later.

One morning, I was eating a nectarine for breakfast.  Jairus was begging me for a bite so I bit off a little piece and then gave it to him.  Next thing I know, Jairus is making this awful choking sound so I immediately picked him up, turned him over and started doing back blows on his back like I learned in my First Aid/CPR classes.  Nothing was happening!  THANKFULLY, Brian came over took Jairus out of my arms, leaned Jairus's belly on his knee and did the back blows.  Brian then told me to sweep his mouth, but I couldn't feel anything.  I remember hearing Brian pleading "Come on Jairus!  Come on Jairus!" it just about broke my heart!  Then, I heard a plop.  The nectarine was out.  The crazy thing is I wasn't freaking out as much as I thought I would.  Most of you make think that sounds horrible, but let me explain why.  It was almost as if someone were right there with us telling me "He'll be fine.  I've preserved him this long.  He'll be fine.  He's here for a reason."  Jairus has scared us many times.  Most of which were when he was in the womb.  I have never had an experience like that where I felt words being spoken without hearing them.  All I know is that I've so grateful for my children.  I don't know what I would do if anything happened to them.  We were definitely blessed, but I NEVER want to go through that again, let alone twice in a week.